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Being goal-oriented is, arguably, one of the greatest personality traits a person can have. Think about it…when you’re swiping on Tinder or Bumble (or wherever,) do you find it more attractive when you come across a person who says they have plans to travel the world and get that big promotion at work or do you find yourself swiping right on those who seemingly have nothing going for them? …Unless your objective is to find a “fixer upper,” most people tend to go for motivated individuals.
Remember: You are a smart, driven, and capable human-being and your future is SO important. You shouldn’t put your dreams on hold for anyone. So if you are doing the dating thing these days, then be sure to find you a lady-friend or gentleman-caller who’s willing to help you find that stability, rather than suppress your vision.
Below are a few tips on how to balance achieving your dreams and dating, simultaneously:
1. Create a Schedule
Let’s say you have a goal to run your first marathon a year from now. Training for something so intense requires a lot of time and energy. It would be wise to create a schedule regardless…but since you’re trying to spend time with your S.O, make sure you are scheduling time for dates as well.
Many people like to use their phones to set reminders. For me, I find it easiest to physically write reminders down. A good old fashioned notebook would do the trick, if you’d like, or you could try my way and use a dry erase calendar. I leave mine in my kitchen so I see it every time I go to get food. Here’s the kind I have, but Amazon’s organization selection is endless so you have plenty of options to choose from.
No more going out dancing till 2 am on Friday night, only to skip out on your run the next morning. If you want to party like that, by all means, go for it…just make sure you are planning accordingly so you don’t fall off track while trying to reach your goals.
Make plans & stick to them…No excuses!
2. Include Your Partner
Continuing with the marathon example: try training together!
Plan a few day dates here and there where both of you go to the gym together or run along a trail at a local park, then stop for some brunch after.
This is a great way to stay motivated, make memories, and, who knows, you might be able to convince them to run the marathon with you! #goals
Keeping your partner in the loop is a great boost for you, but it’ll also make them feel like they are sharing in an important part of your life, which is always a good thing for relationship-building.
3. Don’t Lose Sight
Channel your inner Violet Beauregarde and keep your eyes on the prize (…if you don’t get this reference, we need to talk.)
It’s easy to get caught up in the excitement of dating someone. You become captivated by their energy and you want to spend all your time with them. And while this is not necessarily a bad thing, you have to remember that the strides you are making will be worth it in the end and that you have to maintain focus to reach your goals.
Trust me, you’ll kick yourself a year from now when you’re supposed to be “running that 26.2 miles,” but you can’t because you stopped “training” months ago after becoming too consumed by relationship things.
If the person you are dating is truly right for you, then they will be there to cheer you on the whole way. They will act as your support system, rather than get annoyed or angry anytime you bring up your plans for the future. They should want you to succeed as much as you want them to succeed. So feed off of one another’s ambition/enthusiasm and soon you’ll be on your way to taking over the world together!
Best of luck!
Speaking of relationships, have you read An Open Letter to the Friendships that Faded? I think you’ll be able to relate to it in one way or another. It’s worth a glance!